Oh expectations.
Expectation: n). “A strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future.” -Oxford Languages
Everyone has them about one aspect of their life or another.
We grow up having expectations about what our life will look like when we are older, only to make it to adulthood to find reality looking a lot different than how our imaginations played out for us. Not only is the reality of our situations different then what we may have envisioned for ourselves, but the uncomfortable feelings of confusion, betrayal, loss and stupor fill our beings leaving us to come to terms not only with these newfound situations, but with these feelings we so often try to avoid that have now been brought on by seemingly no fault of our own.
The vision we do or do not have for becoming a parent and raising another life in this world is no exception to this harsh blow to expectations and whatever that may look like for you. There are so many factors we arrange in our minds with the explicit instruction to evolve into exactly, what in our minds, would be the perfect scenario for a particular aspect of our lives. In all truthfulness, what I’m beginning to learn is that most of our factors and explicit instructions rarely come to fruition, but rather leave us with the less than ideal; but is it really less than ideal?
Human beings have a unique and remarkable attribute that allows us to not only adapt to new surroundings or situations, but to learn to thrive within them.
It’s the learning and letting go of the narrative in our head that most often holds us back from embracing and thriving in what was originally our “less than ideal” and transforming it into an experience we didn't know we needed; an experience that we will reference with reverence and love or at least a mountain-sized amount of self respect for ourselves when looked back upon.
Easier read about than put into action, know that the expectations you have are as real as the reality you are living- and yet it is only when we cut ourselves free of those expectations and learn to fall in love with our realities that we shed those uncomfortable feelings brought on by shattered expectations that we can finally evolve into this new space of reality we were meant to take up space in.
Let us be brave in shedding our old skins and embracing the new awaiting us as daunting as it may be.
Our life is calling to each of us if only we can be brave enough to go and live it.